


Bitter Lemons Can Be Sour & Sweet

by McKayRulez



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Dark, Bonding, Caring Sam, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Episode Tag, Episode: s10e03 The Pegasus Project, F/M, Hurt Rodney, Lemon, Mean John, Post Episode: s02e06 Trinity, Rodney's Citrus Allergy, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-28
Updated: 2015-12-28
Packaged: 2018-05-09 23:18:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5559641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McKayRulez/pseuds/McKayRulez
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just what went down when Cameron returned John the lemon. Cameron asks John about his friendship with Dr. McKay. Sheppard gets harsh. Rodney's hurt, Sam comforts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Bitter Sour Lemon

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this awhile back on fanfiction.net. Scene for after the end of "The Pegasus Project". 
> 
> I noticed in the episode itself everyone seemed a bit mean, especially to Rodney, so the mean train continues in this fic. If you don't like that then consider them a mean AU version.
> 
> Mentions/ Spoilers: "The Pegasus Project", "Trinity", "48 Hours", "Redemption" and "Hide and Seek"

Cameron walked into Sheppard's office and tossed the lemon to John behind the desk. "Thanks for that."

Sheppard smiled knowingly. "Worked didn't it?"

Cameron put him hands in his pockets. "Like a charm."

"I know. That's why I always keep it with me. After the Arcturus incident I needed a way to keep him in check."

Cameron nodded. "I heard about that report. Made Sam look a little less cool for blowing up a sun when he blew up a whole solar system."

"Five - sixths" John corrected in his teasing manner with a roll of his eyes then chuckled when he held the lemon and looked at it thoughtfully.  
"Wish I could of seen the look on his face when you showed this to him."

Cameron laughed at that. "He looked at me like I had the plague." Sheppard grinned.

Cameron tilted his head. "You know before we left Rodney said you two are close friends. Stop me if I'm being too blunt Colonel but how can you stand that guy let alone have him on your team?"

Sheppard shrugged leaning back in his chair with that cool air he always seems to have around him. "He gets the job done."

"Well you must be some sort of saint Sheppard if he doesn't bother you. I could never be friends with that arrogant bastard."

Sheppard narrowed his eyes and spoke with a harsher tone then he meant too. "Never said I could stand him. And where not friends."

Cameron's eyes widened slightly. "Oh. Sorry."

Sheppard shook his head looking away. "At a point I thought we could try to be friends but he... He lost my trust at Doranda..."

Cameron looked thoughtful and nodded.

Sheppard talked almost to himself. Like he was thinking out loud. "Not that he would have ever made a good friend regardless if that incident ever occurred anyway."

Cameron sat down in the chair opposite of Sheppard. Sheppard continued.

"McKay's too Arrogant and full of himself... This expedition needs people who can work together and care for each other to survive out here. Not just look out for themselves."

Cameron pulled a "Teal'c" and raise an eyebrow in the Jaffa like expression. "McKay's an arrogant pain in the ass I give you that, but hasn't McKay done a lot for others already?"

Sheppard shook his head looking to the side. "Sure he's had his moments.."  
He thought back to that time early in the expedition when he stepped into the entity at the gate and threw the Naquadah generator threw the gate.  
"But all in all he's still the same as he ever was."  
Sheppard looked to Cameron serious. "You wouldn't believe how many times he's risked the lives of me and my team with the stunts he's pulled to make himself look better. Most of the time he lies about how much time it would take him to do things. Usually he does it faster then he says so that's not the problem but some times he over exaggerates things to much that can lead to problems."  
Sheppard's eyes narrowed. "He's also verbally abusive to his co workers. He just doesn't care to be nice or care what anyone thinks really."  
Sheppard crossed his arms. "We don't need people who don't care about others here. The whole reason where out here now is to save others from the wraith. If he wasn't the leading scientist in ancient technology I think he would have been kicked out by now like Kavanagh."

Sheppard and Cameron looked up when footsteps where heard outside the office door.  
Sheppard frowned when no one came in then shrugged when it seemed that the footsteps had retreated away.


	2. Bitter Sweet Lemon

Sam was walking down the corridor to go catch up to Cameron in Sheppard's office when she noticed Rodney standing outside it. She stopped beside him and was going to ask him what he was doing standing around when she saw how distraught he looked. "What's wrong?" 

He jumped at the sound of her voice and snapped his head to her direction. He opened his mouth but suddenly voices where heard on the other side of the door. He closed his mouth firmly frowning. 

Sam looked back at the door realizing they where ease dropping. She was going to tell Rodney this was wrong to listen in on their private conversation but when she heard what they where saying she was speechless.Sam's eyes widened. She didn't know what to think. In one hand he did have it coming but on the other she was never the type of person to talk bad about people. Even McKay. Sure she might give him an eye roll and maybe tease him and they definitely would banter a lot whenever they where together but she'd never purposefully hurt him. She'd never say stuff like this. She looked over to Rodney and noticed his eyes looked slightly wet and he looked pale. Rodney quickly turned and went off in the opposite direction. 

Sam looked between the door and the quickly retreating Rodney.  
She knew it wasn't her place to get in the middle of this. She didn't even know what she could say but.. She had to say something.  
She ran after him but he was already through the transporter and gone. 

It took Sam a while to find his room but she knew he had to be there. Rodney was to much a outwardly proud person to let people see him so clearly upset unless he wanted to vent his anger and frustrations on his poor minions. She swiped her hand over the panel. No response. "Rodney it's me. Sam." Still nothing. Sam waited a little longer not feeling like it was right to hack the door consoles crystals but eventually, with no other options, she just did it anyway. She walked inside and looked around. She saw him curled up outside on the balcony. She walked over and sat beside him. "You okay?" She asked. She watched him. It was unusual for Rodney to be so quiet. Usually it was impossible to stop him from talking. He obviously wasn't okay. "You know.. What they said.. I'm sure they didn't-"

"I'm not stupid Sam. I know they meant perfectly well what they said."  
He turned his head away from her not wanting to look at her. It hurt enough with what they said, let alone have to face the humiliation afterword.  
"I know I'm difficult.. I know I'm arrogant, petty, bad with people.. I knew that already. I just-"  
He started shaking slightly. Sam reached out and put a hand on his shoulder.  
"I just thought.. That I earned back his trust and.. I thought he was my friend.."  
Rodney looked out across the ocean trying to fight back the emotional wave that he felt.  
He frowned hard. He had to get it together. He was stronger then this. He would be angry. Not cry. He wouldn't cry in front of Sam.  
He looked to Sam in a glare. "If I thought he was my friend then whose to say anyone is? Are they all lying to me behind my back?"

Sam looked at him concerned. "No. No. I'm sure your friends are real and care about you."

Rodney rolled his eyes. "Yeah. Who?" He set his mouth firm in a line.  
Sam tried to think but she didn't actually know anyone from the Atlantis expedition besides Dr. Weir to know if anyone was his friend.  
Rodney took that as a no. "See. I knew it." He played with his fingers in agitation. "How could I have been so stupid that I didn't see it before?!  
Was I really that lonely to not realize the person I hang out around most actually hated my guts?!" 

"I'm sure he doesn't hate you that much." Sam said feeling like this conversation to help him was only getting worse by the minute. 

"I tried so hard Sam! I did so many things right and I make one mistake and everyone hates me! Everyone looses their trust in me. After all I've done?! It's not good enough. It's always been like this. I do one thing wrong and suddenly I need to be punished and no one cares about what good I did do." 

"Rodney, that's not true. We do see the good you do. You're-" Sam got cut off and Rodney pointed to her and began talking with his hands animatedly. 

"No! Even you wrote me off. I made that one mistake with Teal'c and you sent me to Russia!"

Sam opened her mouth to dispute but then shut it. Her face turned pale. He was right. She did the same exact thing... 

Rodney watched her reaction and could tell he was right. A part of him had desperately wanted her to dispute that. That she hadn't been the one that sent him away but some other person. Maybe an official for the Government or something. Her reaction though, gave a different answer. Rodney started to break. His voice came out weak. "Remember what I told you about my parents?... They where right weren't they?.." Tears started to drift from his eyes. "I am horrible and deserved to be blamed for everything."  
He lowered his head and he began to tremble quietly. Not wanting to make his cries vocal. 

"No! No Rodney! That's not true! Don't- Don't say that!" 

Sam watched him. Feeling sadness wash over her. She had always thought Rodney was so strong in himself and didn't care what people had thought but now she could see the truth and it all clicked into place. Sure the man was arrogant but he had a right to be. He's one of most brilliant people in two galaxies. Sure he shows off some times and wants to impress people but that's because he wants to feel accepted and important to others. It showed he actually did care what people thought of him, he just didn't like to show it under his protective layer of pride. His full of himself nature and confidence only really applied to his brain, in other aspects, she was sure he felt insecure in. He was socially awkward with people and bluntly honest, but was that his fault or such a bad thing? 

"I'm you're friend Rodney, and if you don't think I am then know I want to be." She hugged him and his shaking intensified. His fingers flexing impulsively. She started to stoke his back and she started to hear his sobs. Now vocal. His layer of pride and self defenses where starting to fall away for her. She ran her hand through his hair and placed her head next to his. After a while she started to whisper words of encouragement into his ear trying to make him feel better by fuelling his ego. Something she would never do unless it was important. She mentioned all of his accomplishments in the reports she had read after the data burst's started coming from Atlantis. She then tried to get his mind off the people in Atlantis by telling him about her latest's missions and what her latest's projects where in the lab. Rodney, still unusually quiet, just listened. Laying his head on her chest, soaking in her embrace. After a while Rodney started to talk again, asking about her lab projects and making his own suggestions and comments and telling her what he'd do. 

Soon they watched the sunset and the two kept talking. Sam forgot all about the fact that she should have been on the Odyssey ship hours ago, or take in the fact that they took off without her on board not realizing she wasn't there. All she did notice was how beautiful the place was and how much it meant to her to talk to someone who finally understood her techno babble for a change and could keep up with her. How peaceful if felt. Like there was no pressures or impending doom in a far off galaxy. Just two people, talking science. 

Rodney's eyes where looking up at her. They where so expressive, deep and blue. When had she started noticing that his eyes clearly reflected his emotions? His fingers and how they where un-resting, constantly moving and dancing. His voice and how good it sounded, when it wasn't yelling or saying bitter things. When did she notice how appealing those slanted slips looked? She didn't know. Was it just now? This evening? Maybe it had it been there the whole time and she just didn't realize it, or want to admit it. His fingers reached up and cupped the back of her head as his eyes stared into her own. 

"Thank you." He said. 

"For what?" She asked, her brain suddenly felt like it wasn't working.. To preoccupied with recent thoughts. 

"For being here for me." He said simply.

"Always."


End file.
